Reply To: The Power of the Personal,” with Mythologist Dennis Slattery, Ph.D.”
Dr. Slattery, so much gratitude to you for planting the seeds of the power of the personal. And thank you James and all others who are moving this thread, and branching into different areas of the personal and the power that lies therein.
James, you branched into an immensely important topic of “aging”. You wrote,
” For most of human history the elder adults lived and died within the family unit; and grandparents were an essential part of the family structure because the interplay between: young, middle, and elder individuals not only gave life meaning and purpose; it provided the necessary tools to navigate the life process; but there have been some huge alterations within modern society that reflect so much of it’s present dysfunction.”
Yes indeed there have been massive alterations in our societal makeup which is to blame for our many unforeseen dysfunctionalities. Massive alterations can also be viewed as progress in science and technology. Take for example the field of medicine. “For most of human history, medicine could do little to prevent or cure illness or extend life, and living to an old age required considerable good fortune. But now medicine has not only cured illness but extended life thus changing our perception of aging and death.”(Field MJ, 1997)
Over half a century ago, Alan Watts wrote, “…problem is that people live far longer because of medicine, and the aging population is accustomed to thinking that death can be indefinitely postponed.” (Watts, 1978). Hence, aging and eventually death in our global culture is an act of resistance. How to avoid it, how not to talk about it, how to think of things other than our mortality. And we continue to avoid this important conversation with ourselves and with others.
In his book, “The Second Wind”, Dr. Bill Thomas navigates us to a path of facing our eventual mortality, and reflecting upon it. He suggests that life can be reimagined. It’s a time of reflection, of new understanding, of illumination. New ways of living and working are waiting to be explored as we age. He guides us into ways of recognizing our most challenging yet most fulfilling stage in life which he refers to as “Elderhood”.
Elderhood, he writes, “offers a depth that far exceeds either the untested innocence of childhood or the frenzied activities of adulthood. Age requires new and unfamiliar and unpleasant sacrifices from us. For Americans and especially for members of the postwar generation, elderhood remains an undiscovered territory. We can explore it if we have the courage to go deep inside ourselves. Its with losing the fear of death that we will be rewarded with a feeling of accomplishment.”
A large body of research points to cultural and historical influences that shape our attitudes towards death and some recent research also affirms that death is an individual journey, shaped by our personal biographies. In most cultures, younger relatives often have a difficult understanding the stories elders tell and retell, writes Dr. Thomas. “…. if it’s not dementia, then I suggest that they understand that repetition is sort of a sophisticated effort to address unresolved conflict, long suppressed anger and disappointments. ”
For Americans and especially for members of the postwar generation, elderhood remains an undiscovered territory. We can explore it if we have the courage to go deep inside ourselves. It’s with losing the fear of death that we will be rewarded with a feeling of accomplishment…..Elderhood is deep. (The Second Wind –pg. 217)
James, I wish to acknowledge you for having led me to this important book. A few years ago, I too did a study on how to reduce fear of death, and whether reflection on this important subject could ease anxiety and depression among the elderly, who are now confined to nursing homes, assisted living facilities and long term care centers.
“The conquest of the fear of death is the recovery of life’s joy. One can experience an unconditional affirmation of life only when one has accepted death, not as contrary to life, but as an aspect of life. Life in its becoming is always shedding death, and on the point of death. The conquest of fear yields the courage of life.”
— Joseph Campbell
Joseph Campbell and the Power of Myth with Bill Moyers (book) (p. 125) (jcf.org)Shaheda